January 18th, 2010  Posted at   Personal

This is a post I had written two months ago, but never ended up publishing. It was supposed to be part of the wedding website which I was working on, but never got time to finish. Its a mass version of the “Our Story” page that goes on a typical wedding website. Thought it would be a good start to re-blogging.

Once was a Dude. Dude lived in his own world. Dude was unkempt. Dude was lazy. Dude was too busy marking merry with other Dudes. Also Dude was in constant denial. Dude thought no lady could stand him.

Then came Lady. Lady was perfect.Lady was opposite of Dude. Lady was exactly same as Dude. Lady worked hard. Lady did chores. Lady loved little things. Lady called relatives and friends in weekends. Lady was smart. Lady was simple. Lady was daunting.

Dude was confused. Dude did what he does best. Dude was fellow in Worldwide Association of Sporadically Toothless Entities (aka WASTE Fellow). Dude pondered. Dude didn’t want to be bothered in his merriment.

Dude finally gave up. Dude could not resist Lady. Dude was spellbound by Lady. Dude did romantic things. Dude bought flowers for Lady. Thrice. Dude sneaked off to show her around town. Dude felt at ease with Lady. Dude’s daddy already cross-examined and approved. Dude was uneasy.

Dude finally confessed love on top of tall building. Lady impressed. Dude on winning streak. Dude took Lady for fancy dinner. Dude used last of credit to buy ring for Lady. Dude got lucky break and had Lady’s attention at beach on full moon night. Dude dropped on his knees. Dude not responsible for crater. Dude proposed to Lady. Lady Happy. Dude Happy.

Lady fall in love. Lady write letter on napkin. Dude totally impressed. Dude married Lady on September 4. Lady oraganized grand reception. Dude told jokes. Lady dressed to kill. Dude killed buffet. Family Happy.

Dude getting married soon. Dude anxious. Dude not anxious. Dude is master of ceremonies. Lady heavy planning. Dude will try to follow lady. You come to dude marriage. You enjoy. Dude enjoy. We all enjoy.

August 26th, 2009  Posted at   Personal

For a change, I am happy. For a change, I look forward to the future. There are things that are about to happen; things that are life-altering, that incite some much needed optimism, that scare the hell out of me, that I actually welcome into my meager life. Lets just say, its that time of the year when I am incredibly positive and scarily anxious at the same time. Nonetheless, its an essential rite of passage and am confident that my plunge into the bay of no return will be both rewarding and rejuvenating.

For years, I needed a control variable, one that puts me in place, that gives me some inkling of a border between normal and excess, one that grounds me deep down into the chasm called reality, and now I am happy that I finally found it. And while I might have been the big bad wolf for most of my public life, I think that finally there are people that see that I have a little more to offer than goofball jokes, unneeded rants and frivolous exploits. I have lived for too long in big minutes and small victories, and now I finally get the chance to relish the small seconds and big victories.

So here’s to change. Here’s to love. Here’s to my amazing luck and incredible fortune. Cheers.

August 16th, 2009  Posted at   General
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- Boil Toor Dal
- While the dal is on the stove, feel free to roam around, chat on the phone, watch tv, feed orphans, debate healthcare policy and write an op-ed about police brutality
- Go back to the kitchen to find smoke, steam and bemused roommates who are wondering if it is better to bring the fire extinguisher or call the fire department
- Calm them down, turn off the flames and extract the top 20% of the unburned dal
- Transfer the dal to another vessel, realize that there is a slight pungent after-taste to it
- Scour the kitchen for any masala that would subdue the burn taste, in that process, help yourself to all or most of the following: Jeera, Garlic, Coriander Powder, Coriander Powder, Red Chilli Powder
- While you might not always like your food salty, feel free to do a little juggling with the salt shaker and pour at least half a handful
- At that point, since the taste hasn’t changed much, bring in the bigger guns. Don’t worry about quantities, you already have a hail mary pass at this point, just pour to your heart’s pleasing all of the following: Sambar Powder, Pav Bhaji Masala, Cholay Masala
- Curse yourself for not having enough self-control, put discipline and composure on the top five changes to make in life list. The tasting turns into a disaster and spice is overwhelming; the overpowering masalas’ mixture might start giving you light headache, so keep some cold water nearby.
- At this point, remember what your momma told you there are only two things to put in any indian dish when it gets a little too spicy – Tomato Paste, and Half cup of milk
- Now let it boil for another 10 minutes till the aroma wakes up the neighbors and the people across the street

When your’re done, bask in the glory that is your special dish; take a minute, take a deep breath and stand back and appreciate your masterpiece. Its only once or twice in life that your creative juices spill out in full force, and in those moments, you should have but little apprehension about the consequences.

Before you feed it to your unsuspecting roommates, take a photograph from your phone and post it on your blog. And hence here it is.


July 30th, 2009  Posted at   General, Healthcare
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mcme…….

I guess, taken on a scale of everything, nothing – leave alone socialism, would work. The catch lies in finding the balance. Basic necessities should not be part of the equation.

People should not have to compete to get food, healthcare, shelter and the likes. The big inequality of it all lies in the government going out of their way, to save corporations while individuals are being pushed into absolute poverty – on to the roads just because they had to go to the emergency room once. The healthcare plan reform is surprisingly a tougher bill to sell than an 800 Billion ’save the financial sector’ bill or trillions of dollars worth of spending on wars.

In short, the key lies in finding a balance and assuring that certain basic human necessities aren’t left to chance just for the sake of capitalism.

Putting this in perspective of the classroom, everyone in the class has more or less equal access to text books, study material and classroom facilities. Now failing the whole class to teach them a lesson, that sounds more like bad dictatorship!!

kiran…….

A government safety net is hardly socialism; as long as the government is not the sole owner and distributor of any good or service, socialism is the last thing that comes to mind. Of course the wars (which are big mistakes and atrocities in the first place and are therefore inexcusable), and the bailouts (which were a stopgap for presumably avoiding a systemic collapse and a subsequent depression) have nothing to do with anti-socialism or smart policy either. But there are two problems with bigger social service network – one, the cost of implementing such an undertaking and two, the problem of free riding. Even California, which spends over sixty billion dollars on public health, still makes healthcare a prominent issue every election, and every year what is the cost of maintaining the same level of services – cutting back from more important spending on education.

In that respect, I think India sets a somewhat perfect example for the rest of the world – the government would hardly spend on healthcare, food would be always scarce and unemployment benefits is an unheard-of concept, but it did build several thousand new colleges, which are churning out world-class citizens that can stand on their own. On the other hand, the ration system in India is one of the most poorly managed systems in the world with rampant corruption and incredible waste; I say that not because its a bad idea, but because implementing such a large social system for so many millions of people is anything but herculean. Which brings me to the second point that social systems work well in the Denmarks, Swedens and Canadas that have less than a fifth of the populace of the United States and sliver of India’s population. There is something to be said about public programs, that they are a nightmare to manage for large number of constituents. Think just healthcare, if there is a cheaper public option tomorrow, then simply the insurers will defer the unhealthy to the public system. Over time, employers will shift to the public system, which will lead to bankruptcies of the public insurers, and the end of the day the real problem of inflated healthcare costs (which is very achievable through tort reform) will never see light.

At the end of the day, there is much to be debated about public programs, and I most religiously agree to the need to cease the rampant wastage on the wars and focus on welfare of citizens, but there are limitations to public programs and there are misconceptions of what socialism means. What I intend to imply is that public programs inculcate tremendous wastage and a degree of dependence, just from the fact that government is poorly run simply because of substandard incentives. More importantly, there is a desperate need to develop incentive-based systems instead of charity-based systems, because as long as there are freebies, people will rest on their asses. And that includes me.

July 23rd, 2009  Posted at   Politics

Read this today…..

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before but had once failed an entire class.

That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.

The professor then said, “OK, we will have an experiment in this class on socialism. All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade.”

After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B.

The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy.

As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.

The second test average was a D! No one was happy.

When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F.

The scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.

All failed, to their great surprise, and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.

Could not be any simpler than that.